I always thought I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. While they changed throughout the years, I always had a definite vision for my future. While my childhood dreams of becoming either a nun or Mary Tyler Moore didn't fit my decision to be a music business executive, both were there when I needed to find direction in where I was going.

For the first time in my life, I find myself with no direction. Having sworn off the business world for good, a recent NY times article caught my attention, boasting of historical preservationists fighting for a Russian monument. In the same 24 hours, I also seriously considered becoming a fashion designer, writer, anthropologist, or possibly an Eastern European scholar.

They say when you graduate from college, the world is yours for the taking. No longer hampered by the "college degree required" tag on most job listings, you are free to roam the classified in search of your dreams. Isn't life crazy though? For the first time in our lives, we experience the "true freedom," that inspired countless fights with our parents, and yet when obtained, it paralyzes us. Setting to the monumental task of answering "What do you want to be when you grow up?" definitively feels like tying yourself up with chains. Closing the door on all the other dreams we've dreamt in our life brings on a new feeling of sadness, unlike those experienced when graduating high school, moving away from home, or breaking up with your sweetheart. It, like so many current experiences, are alien to us.